Monday, May 19, 2008

First set of answers

The first question that I'm going to answer is from a beautiful sista who lives in Trinidad. Nicole asked:
"Have you ever been involved in an accident when someone is guiding you?"
The answer to that is a big YES. Because people tend to be a tad bit careless and selfish, I have most definitely been ran into walls and guided right off of a step, without being warned that the step is even there. Thankfully those accidents that happen from week to week have only resulted in one "real" injury.
In 1997, my final semester in undergrad, my friend CB was rushing to get inside of the church, where he was serving on the music staff. He was supposed to be on the organ in two minutes, and we were probably four minutes away from the door. So, the brotha was in a mad dash to get inside the building.
Well, as he was rushing, and I was saying, "Slow down.", my left foot slipped off the side of the sidewalk, and my ankle cracked. I actually heard the bone break.
Did that slow my friend down from trying to get inside of the building? Nope, sure didn't. CB stayed on his mission to get to the organ before the clock struck 7:00. So, I had to walk on that broken ankle until we got in the church. Once we got inside, I was able to get off the ankle, but I had to sit through the service before we went to the hospital.
So, my last semester in college I was having to figure out how to walk with crutches and a cane for the blind. Needless to say, it was quite, quite interesting, and a challenge, I might add. But I did it. I graduated as scheduled.
And yes, CB is still my friend. I love him, even though I don't always feel secure when we walk together. He's still a good brotha, and he's in my cabinet of best friends. And trust me, it is quite difficult to make the list of "best friends." It's a short list. And he made it.

The second question comes from a woman named Renee. I actually thought that my sister, Renea, who blogs at had asked the question. But after looking more closely at the spelling of the names, I realized that these two ladies were different.
Renee asked: “Do you ever want to get married? Have you ever been in a serious relationship that could have possibly lead to marriage? Do you want to have kids?”
Only because I'm a little out of time this evening, I will provide the short answers to these questions. Of course, to answer these questions fully would require me to expound more. Renee, I promise to spend more time on this. Perhaps I will tomorrow.
Do I ever want to get married? It depends when you ask me that question. But overall, I would have to say. I think that marriage, with the right man, would be good for a sista named Angie. And I think that marriage for the man that has enough love and courage to marry me could be good for him. Oh yeah, I'm confident that I'm a good catch.
I think that marriage could offer me support in a number of ways: financially, emotionally, spiritually, and sexually. All of that sounds nice enough to make me hope that I will one day share my life with someone. But he has to be a good somebody. I don't share a biscuit with someone that ain't worth my company. I'm certainly NOT going to share my life with someone that offers me no positive and loving significance to my life.
Have I ever been in a serious relationship that could have led to marriage? No, I haven't. I will definitely deal with this question later. There's some things I would like to say regarding this very question.
Do I want to have kids? Yeah, one or two. Boy and girl... But as I get older, I realize that time is not being very cooperative in the baby dept. If I don't get married in the next four years, I won't be having a baby naturally. I don't want to be too far in my 30's when I get pregnant. Having a baby that is disabled is more likely the older you get. And since I know how disability impacts a person's ability to live in this society, I rather not throw the dice, knowing how the odds are. Perhaps I will adopt. I've always wanted to do that.
And yes, those are the short answers to those questions. **smile** Again, I will pick these questions back up again this week.

The third question comes from a lady by the name of Canada. She e-mailed me and asked: "Do you have a guide dog?"
The answer to that question is no. I don't have one, don't plan to get one, and there is nothing anyone can say to change my mind. I don't like dogs.
I see how these dogs could be helpful in terms of giving a person that is blind more independence and accessibility. But, like I said, I don't like dogs. I'm actually frightened by them. So, no need in pretending that a guide dog would be an option for me. I'll continue to use my cane or these sighted guides that continue to run me into walls and off curbs. At least I don't have to clean poop up after they go to the potty on the sidewalk. Know what I mean?

The last questions come from The Last Domino. Although he wrote that he ended up reading more entries on my blog and found the answer to his questions, I thought I would still answer his question here. Plus, I thought I would provide a few links to previous posts, where I explored some of the answers to his questions.
He asked: “Is your blindness congenital or the result of an accident?
Actually, two questions: If not congenital, how long have you been blind?”
Is my blindness congenital or the result of an accident? That's a bit of a trick question.
Well, my Uveitis, which I contracted when I was eight-years-old is indeed what doctors would likely classify as congenital. But the Glaucoma, which is the theif that stole my sight, was kind of sort of an accident. I'm blind due to what we consider malpractice of a doctor. It is my opinion, along with countless others, that the doctor that was treating me at that time did not take the steps to prevent the Glaucoma from taking over and evicting my sight from my eyes.
The doctor was giving me steroids for the Uveitis. And steroids can result in Glaucoma setting in. Well, he was not looking out for this disease, even though he was giving me steroid injections in my eyes. When he finally diagnosed me with Glaucoma, I was grossly ill and my sight was already making a mad dash into the land of "Goodbye Forever".
Yes, we sued the doc. But we needed a medical testamony from a doc that could testify that it was indeed malpractice. Well, the doctor who was working tirelessly to try to reduce the effects of the Glaucoma killed himself. And when he died, he took his testamony where ever he went.
Yes, my experiences are so varying and unusual. Angie's Life... What can I say?
How long have I been blind? I started losing my sight at age 10. I lost all of my functional sight at 17. When I was 19, I lost the light perception that I was clinging to. I have not seen anything through these wrecked up eyes of mine in nearly 15 years.
Here's some links to posts that I have written regarding the onset of illness and my visual disability. Enjoy reading, for all it's worth.
The Genesis of My Eye Problems
Changed Forever
Brown Eyes

**Boy, this was a long entry. Next time, I will break the questions down in separate posts if it looks like it's going to be this long again. Well, I hope I answered your questions to your satisfaction. If not, ask me to clarify. And if you have more questions, I'm here to answer. And that goes for anyone else out there. Ask away...

Until we meet again, love God and His people. May you find peace, satisfaction, and fulfillment.

Peace,
Angela

UPDATE: My friend CB called me this morning and went off because I told my story about the broken ankle with his actual name. Even though he didn't remember the set of events around the injury, he did not like it that I called him out on the world wide web. As he requested, and only because I love him so much, I took the time to edit this post to change his name to his initials instead of his actual name.
Now, for the purpose of disclosure, I want anyone that reads this to know that I love this brotha. He ain't the best guide, but he is better than most. And although he's not a great guide, he's a wonderful friend to this girl named Angie. And for the record, CB has not caused me to have any more accidents since then. I haven't had to kiss any walls or stumble off any steps because he was guiding me. So, I guess he has improved over the years.

And Randy: Thank you for policing my blog. I guess my assumption that no one that actually knows me is reading my blog was just disproved.
Randy, my darling, I'm glad that you're reading. I do consider it an honor.
While I'm at it, let me refer my readers to your wonderful website.

Readers of Nuvision: Check out my friend Randy. He's a wonderful music artist. I call him Randy. But his name is Randevyn. Check him out.
His upcoming project is set to release in September. Show the brotha some love.

I'm out.
A

4 comments:

Amenta said...

Hi Angie, this was enlightning. Its funny to me that people think the way they do. Its like if you say you are blind for some reason people think there is also something wrong with your hearing, the speak a bit louder...LOL My thought is you have the same feelings, wishes and desires as most of us. I understand there may be caveats that may present a different set of choices as you mentioned the man you get in position with will and should posesses a great level of sensitivity and caring, but again all of us inside desire no less sensitivity whether we are sighted or not.
Would you say so?

Unknown said...

Thanks for answering my questions. I look forward to hearing more.

Angela L. Braden, Writer, Speaker, Professor said...

Ensayn: I agree with you.
I hope you're doing well. See you around...
Angie

Renee: Yes, I will be sure to fully answer your questions with the time, energy, and honesty that it requires. I don't know if you were exactly looking for an extended answer to your questions, but I was inspired to dig deep to answer your questions. Of course, to quickly answer your questions is the easy and comfortable way, but I'm not looking for comfort all the time, especially when it is not real comfort. Got me?

Peace, y'all!
A

The First Domino דומינו said...

Thanks Angie. I'm satisfied with the answers you provided.

Namaste