Saturday, August 23, 2008

Transition Part IV.

**this post is a series of posts. You may want to read the following posts before reading this one. Enjoy and be blessed.**

Part I
Part II
Part III

I felt that God had accomplished what He hoped to accomplish by sending me to my state job. I learned some very valuable lessons about life, my personality and issues, how to interact with others who I have a serious conflict with, and how to trust Him with my very life as we were driving back and forth on those dangerous highways every morning and evening.

I also felt that God had used me in the way He wanted to use me in the lives of my co-workers, clients, business partners, and individuals in the community. People needed to actually see a person with a significant disability smiling, thriving, working, and at peace with life, even if a disability was indeed present and impacting daily life activities.

My time at DARS was coming to a close. But honestly, I didn’t know what I was going to do about getting away from there. I really felt helpless. Helpless because my computer problems were still impacting my ability to do my job, which was causing a great deal of stress overload; and helpless because I felt like I would not be hired any where else with my blind eyes. I felt trapped. And my heart ached immensely because of the invisible bars of fear that caged my optimism and hope for my future.

I called Devia, one of my best friends, and shared with her about all of the angst that I was experiencing. She told me that she would begin to pray that the Lord open another door for me to enter. I told a few others to start praying with me and Devia. Not believing was not an option for me. I had to believe that God would do something. I didn’t quite know how He was going to do it. But feeling hopeless and sad was not the ticket. And prayer was the best way/weapon to fight the fear that was closing in on me.

Only a week after the prayers had ascended from our heart to the mind of God, I saw an employment listing for an instructor position at one of the junior colleges right here by my house. I applied for the job right away. To tell you the truth, I even asked the main secretary at my job to scan my transcripts for me so that I could attach them to my application for the job that I was applying for. Bold… Yes I know.

A week after I applied, I got an e-mail from the chair of the department in which I had applied. He wanted to meet with me. I called him, and we had a little discussion over the phone. After a quick little chit chat, he invited me to interview for the position. My heart celebrated with gladness and relief before I could even tell the man goodbye. But as soon as I hung up the phone, my heart got flooded with fear all over again.

**Stay tuned for the final entries. I anticipate that this will take only two more posts.**

1 comment:

Babz Rawls Ivy said...

How exciting! Oh I am so pulling for you! And I know youa re pulling for me.

Thank you for your kind and loving comment. I am working through as best as I can. I am reposting things from last year as a way to stay connected to you and other folks who offered such kind kind words of support.

Do keep us posted. I see a new carrer change and I think it will be more suited to you. If this ain't it, we move to the next thing!